Military Special Needs Network

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The IEP Game

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You wouldn’t know by my frequent blog posting, perhaps, but we are in the middle of a cross-country PCS. Cross-country PCS – as if we know any other kind. We are always extreme in our moves. From the caravan-esque style way we wind through America (4 children, 3 pets, 2 vehicles, 1 camper) to the number of days we have to get organized before my husband deploys (usually under two weeks – hardly enough time to get unpacked and settled).

And so, yet again, we switch coasts and swap out school districts. We are going from a semi-private Autism co-op and the devil we know to God only knows what. Yes, by law, our current IEP needs to be followed for 30 days. Including placement. But the reality is usually different from what Federal Law outlines as my son’s rights.

I am in the unenviable position of deciding whether I should lawyer up now, before we even get there and flame-spraying everyone, burning bridges and demanding a private day setting; or going in and trying the bake-them-brownies and smile technique. Neither scenarios seem palatable to me. And why do I need to decide? Why can’t the schools do what is best for my son – as outlined by Federal Law – without threats of lawsuits or perpetual ass kissing?

And so I sit here. Overwhelmed and under-motivated. Trying to gear up for the next inevitable big fight.

I need inspiration.

I need intestinal fortitude.

I need…Ryan:



Kelly is a Navy wife and mother to three children; 17 year old NT, 6 and 5 year old boys on the spectrum; and, a perfect-to-her beautiful baby girl. Kelly has been featured in a collection of essays on special needs children entitled, “Wit and Wisdom From the Parents of Special Needs Children.” She can also be found at, and as a guest blogger throughout the blog-iverse. In her spare time, Kelly is the Blog Master for, and member of, the Military Special Needs Network Executive Board. You can contact her via email at

4 comments on “The IEP Game

  1. Niksmom
    August 9, 2013

    Ha! LOVE this! Sending you so many good thoughts as you go through this process…again.

  2. Danette
    August 10, 2013

    This is great! Wishing you all the best with the school situation xoxo

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