Military Special Needs Network

Proudly Supporting all Military Families with a Special Needs Dependent

18 Years and Still Best Friends

When MSNN decided to dedicate a week to working on our relationships, one person popped into my mind: my friend, Laura. Anyone who has had the privileged of knowing Laura, her husband or their beautiful girls knows, without a shadow of a doubt, that their family is a unit. They have an almost visible, tangible bond connecting them. Their marriage is a thing of beauty, their love for each other present at every moment. It’s “them against the world,” and it’s something to behold.

I asked Laura how she keeps her marriage so healthy and strong. Here is what she said:

462759971Almost 18 years later, we are still best friends! After really thinking about it, we were trying to figure what we did differently to keep our relationship strong and this is what we came up with.

1.) LAUGHTER – We joke with each other and laugh all the time. We tease one another like we were in grade school.

2.) Flirt A LOT – its okay to make googly eyes across the table or wherever you’re at, and sometimes be inappropriate.

3.) TOUCH EACH OTHER – We hold hands, even in the car or walking into the grocery store.

4.) COMMUNICATE – Take a second (actually it’s more like a couple of minutes) during the middle of the day to make a quick phone call, send a text or email just to say “I Love You” or send a flirtatious note.

5.) TAKE ADVENTURES – You don’t have to ALWAYS have a destination in mind when you get in the car. We take drives just to find new places to explore. Maybe stop and take a hike or walk.

6.) BE EACH OTHERS BEST FRIEND – We both have our own friends, but at the end of the day share what’s on your mind with one another. I know my hubby is the one person who honestly listens to anything and everything I have to say with no judgments.

7.) HONESTY – Tell each other what you truly is going on. No secrets! If something is upsetting you or bothering you tell one another. If you need or want something more from one another…say it. Don’t expect the other to guess what you’re wanting all the time.

8.) NEVER STOP DATING – I know we are all incredibly busy with everyday things in life but take the time to really enjoy each other’s company. Plan a nice evening out or day out. MAKE THE TIME!

9.) DON’T EVER GO TO BED ANGRY – No relationship is perfect. From time to time there will be a heated argument over something, this is life. Talk about it, figure it out, and then let it go. Kiss each other and cuddle before closing your eyes. Then wake up and make it a new day. This was some of the best advice given to us by my hubby’s grandparents, who are STILL going strong after 50 plus years of marriage

10.) ALWAYS SAY ‘’I LOVE YOU!” -We have noticed when someone hangs up the phone with their spouse they will say “bye” but not “I LOVE YOU.” That is something we never tire of hearing. Say it all the time. Any marriage or relationship takes work, so don’t get lazy about it. Take the time to appreciate and love one another. At the end of the day, as with anything we do in life, whatever you put into it is what you will get out of it. Make the time to strengthen your relationship and make it what you want.

Comments, discussion and insight always welcome!

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